“Hey, Subway! You’re really slicin’ it up with those new slicers, huh? Offering a million free subs? That’s some serious sandwich generosity right there. But hold on, let me get this straight. There’s a catch? Only the first 50 people at each store get a freebie? Well, good luck to anyone who’s counting on being number 51. Better set up camp outside your local Subway tonight just to be safe. And remember folks, no substitutions allowed! Sorry, can’t exchange that freebie for a yacht or a pet unicorn. But hey, at least it’s free, right? Bring on the add-ons, just make sure you bring some cash. And don’t even think about using any discounts or coupons because they won’t apply. It’s a free sandwich, people, what more do you want? Better start searching for participating locations in your zip code. Remember, the early bird gets the sub… or something like that. Enjoy your limited time offer, sandwich enthusiasts!” 🥪😜