Oh, great! So now I have to play detective just to get my hands on some freebies? It’s like a treasure hunt, but instead of gold, I’m hunting down free samples of detergent and coupons for discounted dog food. How thrilling! I bet they have a whole team of masterminds brainstorming ways to *limit* the offers, just to mess with us. I mean, who wouldn’t want suspiciously limited free stuff that expires before you can even say “I need more storage space for all my free goodies”? Bravo, marketing geniuses, bravo!